Paranoia_Agent_09.srt (DOWNLOAD SUBTITLES)
Raa-eee-yaa Ra-ra-e-yo-ra
A magnificent mushroom cloud in the sky
Raa-eee-yaa Ra-ra-e-yo-ra
In the afternoon of birds pecking at food in an alley
Touching the grass under the sunlight streaming through the leaves
I'll talk with you
See, on the lunch bench A dream blossoms
Carry the sound of the waves in your heart
Sink your blues
Stretch a bridge to tomorrow
Don't worry about tsunami
Raa-eee-yaa Ra-ra-e-yo-ra
A magnificent mushroom cloud in the sky
Raa-eee-yaa Ra-ra-e-yo-ra
The afternoon of birds pecking at food in an alley
Raa-eee-yaa Ra-ra-e-yo-ra
The dream I nurtured on the lunch bench
Raa-eee-yaa Ra-ra-e-yo-ra
The afternoon, born on the day of the sunlight streaming through the leaves
Hey, ladies, did you hear?
They say he showed up again. Shonen Bat.
So scary.
That reminds me.
About the one incident that happened the other day.
Oh, that one.
They say that was Shonen Bat, too.
I knew it!
You're talking about that one, right?
Some guests at an Inn somewhere were attacked...
Mrs. Kamohara, you just moved here, so you don't know, do you?
It's OK. You don't have to try so hard.
That unit over there.
In Building C.
Tsuruta's son was suffering from "entrance-exam neurosis", and...
The poor thing. Do you know how many times he failed?
And what? Are you saying Shonen Bat got him?
You won't tell anyone?
No, no!
The truth is...
Fourth time pays for all! Don't run away! Attain academic goals!
Fourth time pays for all! Don't run away! Attain academic goals! Y equals... square root of AX plus B equals...
Fourth time pays for all! Don't run away! Attain academic goals!
Fourth time pays for all! Don't run away! Attain academic goals! Square root of A multiplied by the sum of X plus... over B...
square root of A multiplied by the sum of X plus... over B...
What?
Osamu, sweetie, I brought a midnight snack...
I don't need any midnight snacks!
I have an important practice-exam tomorrow. Leave me alone!
Don't catch a cold, alright?
I know I dropped something...
Now, begin!
It's OK.
I just have to keep a cool head and just do it, and I'll be OK...
You gotta be kidding...
Excuse me! I'm feeling ill!
Oh, come on!
No way...
There's no way!
I'm in here!
Damn...
I said I'm in here...
I memorized them...
I memorized them with so much effort...
Finished... I'm finished...
Help me!
What on earth?!
You!
That's scary.
I just heard he killed himself. I had no idea that's how it happened.
I know. I couldn't believe it first, either.
That reminds me!
Speaking of which, I also heard...
What? Is it about Shonen Bat?
You know, the incident the other day. Near 4th Street...
Oh, the mother-in-law murder at Famille Palace Condo!
The mother-in-law murder!
So, did Shonen Bat do that one as well?
You won't tell anyone?
No, no!
The truth is...
You call this fish-meatball soup?
How dare you serve me ready-made food like this from a supermarket?
So you don't like it?
You should say "Does it not suit your palate?"
And I don't know if that's supposed to be fashionable or what...
but if you have time to dye your hair...
you should have time to learn how to speak properly first!
What kind of a look is that?
Who do you think made the down-payment for this condo?
I sold the house in the country just because Toshiyuki begged me to...
but I'd never thought I'd be living in a rabbit hole like this instead.
No wonder you two haven't managed to have any kids yet.
We haven't managed because you live here!
Toshi, can't you come home early for a change?
I can't stand it any more.
Your mother?
Asleep.
Look, how about next Wednesday?
It's my birthday. Can't we at least go somewhere alone?
Toshi, darling? It's me.
Oh, don't worry. A man has to give priority to his work over everything else.
You can't be expected to remember her birthday, right?
Old hag!
Since I'm always causing you a lot of trouble.
Happy birthday.
Now make some fish-meatballs.
First, fillet some sardines.
Then, mince and mash the fish-meat.
Use eggs to make it stick together.
The Ayukawa Family recipe also calls for tofu, and...
What?
Are you going to disobey me?
Well, then you can pay me back the down-payment money if...
I've had it!
I've had it!!
I can't stand it any more!
Toshi?
Toshi, darling?
Toshi! Toshi!!
Toshi, darling!
Toshi, darling! Help me...!
OK.
How scary.
But Shonen Bat is supposed to attack people who are cornered, right?
Then shouldn't the young wife have been the victim?
So he made a mistake.
I guess because the mother-in-law got to the door first.
The mother-in-law?
Shonen Bat has a tough job, doesn't he?
Speaking of getting the wrong person...
I've heard a story...
What, is it about Shonen Bat?
You won't tell anyone?
No, no!
I heard it from a friend of mine who works at the women's clinic.
Hachiya Women's Clinic
Hachiya Women's Clinic Congratulations, Mrs. Lizuka...
Congratulations, Mrs. Lizuka...
you're three weeks pregnant.
Thank you so much!
We had our misgivings about in-vitro fertilization...
since it's so expensive and everything, but I'm so glad we did it.
We provide our patients with "Evidence Based Medicine"...
in other words, treatments that are based on scientific grounds.
You used the wrong sperm and egg?!
Give me that!
Sperm: Naoto Kawakami... Egg: Sanae Shimomura...
They're both wrong!
The fetus has no relation whatsoever to the parents-to-be!
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
Doctor...
Burn it.
If you tell anyone, I'll kill you!
See, this is the head, and this is the body.
My baby.
Yes, it sure is.
Look, you can see it's beginning to take a clear human form now.
My baby's growing well, isn't it?
Yes, very well.
You're in intense pain?
The baby's moving so violently, that it hurts a lot.
That bad?
I wonder if it's a premature delivery.
Well, let's take a look.
Doctor... Tell me, it's not a miscarriage?
You'll be fine. Just fine!
It's your baby.
My... my baby!
Yes, your baby! That very healthy baby of yours!
See, it's your adorable baby!
That can't be true!
There's no way such medical malpractice could happen!
Besides, how can an unborn baby be holding a bat in its hand?
Shonen Bat already exists now.
How can he be born in the future?
Wait a minute.
Mrs. Kamohara, you said your husband is a scriptwriter, didn't you?
A scriptwriter?
It means that his job is to make up stories, right?
So he's got a lot of influence, right? And makes a lot of money, right?
And people call him Sensei, right?
Then his wife should do a little better job of making up stories, too.
Oh, but that story reminds me.
My sister's acquaintance's cousin's daughter...
What, is it about Shonen Bat?
You won't tell anyone?
No, no!
The truth is...
Hiroki... do you remember?
About the day we met...
Of course I do.
I won't forget it as long as I live.
It was a fateful encounter.
I think you are the last gift that God gave me.
When the last of those dead leaves fall, my life will also end...
Don't be ridiculous! You're going to get well, Akiko!
But I'm happy...
for being able to spend the last days of my life with you...
Akiko... I won't let you go.
I absolutely refuse to let you die!
If...
If I lose you...
If you're taken away from me, I...
How can I go on living?!
It's done!
Akiko!!
That's sad, isn't it?
Well, but at least they were able to die together.
Yeah, if they were together.
Well... but...!
There's something strange about that story.
I mean, that's a famous...
A famous what?
Oh, yes, speaking of famous!
What, is it about Shonen Bat?
I was watching TV with my husband the other day. And...
It's the bottom of the ninth inning, with two outs.
One more hit and it could turn out to be a walk-away victory.
The pitcher, Abukawa, has been doing well so far...
but it looks like the batting lineup of the opponent team has caught up with him.
Now, the infielders are forming a huddle on the mound.
It's his first year. Such support from his teammates is essential.
I'm sorry.
Don't worry about it!
Only one more to go. Three strikes and we're out of here.
Right!
You've been good with the heat...
so make it look like a fastball and then give him a breaking ball down low.
All right?
OK!
No.
Better to make him run so go low and outside.
I'll take care of him after that.
Ah, OK.
No, why don't you go low and inside. That way I can make a diving catch.
OK.
Wow, the outfielders are running towards the mound now.
That's very nice.
Such support encourages a rookie like nothing else.
Try to jam him up and high and inside. I'll catch it!
OK...
No! You want to go high and outside! Trust me.
Can you throw it down the middle for me? My son's watching in the stands...
I want him to see me make the final play, to end the game.
All right. Abukawa, you do whatever you want.
Everything depends on you now.
We're counting on you, Abukawa!
Now, the game continues.
Having received encouragement from his teammates...
what will Abukawa throw?
What am I supposed to throw?
What am I supposed to do?
That can't be true!
I mean, you can't possibly hear the conversation between the players...
and besides, if it really did happen, it would've been on the news...
I saw that game, too.
Me, too.
What, didn't you know, Mrs. Kamohara?
It's a pretty famous story.
Hello.
Hello.
Who's that?
That's Mr. Arizuka. You know, that Arizuka...
That Arizuka?
What, "the" Mr. Arizuka?
Hang on, what happened to make him look like that?
Well...
And he ate everything?
That'll make him put on weight, all right.
Yeah, that will.
But you know, imagine not being able to eat in this day and age.
I have! I've heard this story.
Shonen Bat got a man suffering from starvation.
It's been 100 days.
I can't take it any longer!
I'm hungry.
Is that a mast?
No, a periscope?
Hey, what kind of story is that?!
Stop talking gibberish, woman!
There's no way something like that could happen!
If you're a wife of a screenwriter...
you should at least give it an unexpected twist in the end, or something!
- That's right!
- That's right! - So true!
- My story's even better! - So true!
How about this, then?
What, they found out about my corrupt dealings?
Call Shonen Bat!
Shonen Bat!
If we don't act now, I'll get arrested!
They say Shonen Bat appears to a person who's cornered!
However...
What are you doing? Call Shonen Bat, now!
Well, but...
How do you know a politician?
If you're gonna talk rubbish, do it while you're sleeping!
If you have to lie to us, at least make it a better one!
- It doesn't sound real! - Oh, please!
- It doesn't sound real! - Indeed!
- It doesn't sound real!
Seven, six, five, four, three, two, one...
I love you
Thank you for calling.
Thank you for your continuing business. This is your paper recycler.
If you have any old newspapers or old magazines at home...
we'll take them, and in exchange we'll give you toilet paper...
Honey?
Honey? What's wrong?
What happened to you?
Shonen Bat...
Shonen Bat...
Hey, how did he attack you?
Tell me how he attacked you!
Ambulance...
Hey! Hey, come on! How did he attack you?
How did he attack you?!
ETC
To begin...
By the twist of the passage of time...
the King of Azuchi takes the command.
And a monkey entertains a fox.
Healing patches the pieces of a dream.
Flames break out left and right.
A falcon runs and runs, holding it in his arms.
Who's plotting the Honnoji Incident?
And then...